Impatient to begin, I installed a mod called WinkelWagon, which adds a driveable shopping trolley to the game which drives as close as FS2011 gets to 'lightning fast'. I had a bunch of potentially time-saving mods to call on and I was confident these would speed things along, but in fact their stubborn refusal to obey the laws of physics served mainly to slow me down. That said though, I did hope this mission wouldn't take too long. After that though, they start showing up on top of mountains, under bridges and in such far-off, exotic locations as the dairy farm. The first fifteen or so are admittedly easy to collect because they're scattered close to where you initially spawn. There's no sense to the placement of the bottles, either. It takes agonising minutes just to reach the other side of the crudely modelled (and useless) town. There are no cars or fast-travel options in FS2011, just realistically ponderous tractors which can be outrun on foot. The size of the world is exacerbated by the available vehicles. Instead, like everything else in FS2011's broken world, they just clipped benignly through each other. There's also a windfarm lining one of the hills, which I'd previously built out of sheer boredom in the hope that the too-close windmill blades would catch and explode the turbines spectacularly. There are thirty fields, a town, several refinery buildings, a port, a lake and a mountain range - all built to scale. So, for starters, rest assured that the world it's set in is huge. If this sounds like an easy task, I haven't yet rammed home quite how tedious FS2011 can be. Why are the bottles there? Why doesn't the game tell you anything about them? Why would you even want to collect them? These things remain a mystery - but I'm a sucker for a treasure hunt and the idea grabbed me: I swore I would collect every single one. What Bottle Finder does is simple wherever you are in the world it directs you to the nearest of 100 bottles hidden throughout the (farm)land. Eventually however, using one of the smaller mods I'd downloaded, I found a mission that imbued the game with much-needed purpose. Even after I'd grabbed ten of the weirdest mods I could find, from deployable crates to driveable corpses, it was still drearier than a car-load of wet Mondays and utterly unable to hold my attention.
So, you can imagine my excitement at sitting down to write a modding guide for it. It's boring, even to those who resign themselves to tedium in advance, as pointless as a chocolate covered cat turd and built on physics so unnatural I genuinely suspect it to be haunted. Here's what happened.įarming Simulator 2011 is, on the face of it, not a very interesting game - but if you look deeper you'll find that it's actually very badly made too.
But that didn't stop him from becoming one with Farming Simulator.
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